How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
