How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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