if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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