i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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