Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I forget how to act sober
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