you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
