ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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