I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
