when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
