you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
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