This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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