garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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