i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
