is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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