I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
