Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
