Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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