i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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