Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
