for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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