I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Randomize
