it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
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