Nicole vs. Life
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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