Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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