The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Why can't burritos get me drunk
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize