well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
