he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Send help, water and tortillas.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
