the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
