Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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