I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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