im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize
