Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
