Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
