if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
She told me I should be a condom model.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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