I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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