I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
wow bdsm is so cute
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize