In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize