you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
