you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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