i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
