I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
