My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize