whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
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