Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
