he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
