in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize