Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
