I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
