you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
He felt like a one man threesome
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
