Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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